A wedding speech is one of many wedding traditions you shouldn’t miss out on. It is also a tradition without official rules, so preparing for it might be challenging for some. One thing is for sure – your speech should be unique and distinctive. But what to do when you’re not a born speaker and can’t figure out how to write your wedding speech? Here are some tips on preparing for your speech, how to write it and what should be said.

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How to Write a Wedding Speech

The base of speech writing is precise preparation. Improvising is not inappropriate on this occasion – you would embarrass yourself by standing still in front of all wedding guests. To avoid this, try to have enough time to prepare your speech. What your address should include can’t be generally said. Try to focus on what kind of relationship you and the newlyweds have together. 

The most stressful part of your speech is the beginning. Once you start talking, the words will come out of your mouth effortlessly, so it’s crucial to overcome the initial stress. 

  • Most suitable is to ask for attention at the beginning. Introducing yourself should follow. That isn’t necessary at small weddings, where everyone knows who is who.
  • You can also thank the guests for coming to the wedding. 
  • What comes next depends entirely on you. 
  • Try to create the most personal speech you can. Don’t stick to some general ideas you’ll find on the internet – these won’t make your talk distinctive.

What You Can´t Forget to Include in Your Speech

There is no right or wrong way of writing a wedding speech. However, there are some general recommendations of what you shouldn’t forget to say. You don’t have to try your hardest to make your talk funny and entertaining – there will be enough fun later in the evening. That doesn’t mean that you have to be as formal as you can – make sure your personality shines through your speech. Try to spark up the atmosphere by talking about your trips, funny stories or your relationship. There are some things your talk should include.

  1. Attract the attention of the guest, which is usually done by clicking on your glass. 
  2. Introducing yourself should follow. Also, appreciating the guests for coming is necessary. Before you start your speech, praise the newly married couple. 
  3. Start your memorable speech. In the end, give a toast with wishes for the couple.

What to Avoid

The rules of what not to say are on small weddings not that strict as they would be on larger ones. But that certainly doesn’t mean that there aren’t things you shouldn’t say. Something you would say might make everyone feel awkward. Cursing is the main thing you cannot do at weddings. 

  • Don’t even mention the brides’ or grooms’ exes. Talk about their future, not the past they need to leave behind.
  • Don’t mimic or tease them. Of course, if you’re best friends, some little jokes will be funny and pleasant. But be careful about inappropriate jokes, for example, about their exes or tragic experiences. 

Who Gives a Wedding Speech

No rule says who should and should not prepare and give the wedding speech. It’s all about agreement. If you want to ask somebody to give a speech at your wedding, think first about their personality – would they want to prepare it? Are they suitable for it? Keep in mind that forced speech would make the situation awkward for both – the newlyweds and the speaker.

The Father of Bride

Father’s speech is necessary at most weddings. His speech comes right after the start of the wedding reception. It is the most important one, which takes us to the fact that it should be much more formal than the others. If you’re planning the groom’s father’s speech also, it should come right after the bride’s father’s one. 

The father’s wedding speech should focus mainly on the daughter. Emotions are necessary, so talking about her personality, childhood, and her achievements is a must.

  • Of course, talk about the groom. He also needs to be evaluated. Talk about how happy you are that your daughter is marrying this guy. 
  • Don’t forget about the wedding wishes and blessings.

The Groom

Groom’s speech usually comes after the parent’s one. First, you should thank them for their wishes and blessings. Also, thank the guests for coming to your wedding. Don’t forget about the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Now it’s the perfect time to introduce your man of honour, which will later give his speech. The groom’s speech should be full of gratitude and kindness. Spark up the atmosphere by talking about how you two met each other and how you propose. In the end, tell your bride what she means to you and how you are in love with her.

The Man of Honour

His speech should be full of creativity and originality. Everybody assumes that his speech will make them burst out laughing. That doesn’t mean that adding offensive jokes is okay. Focus on some funny or awkward situation that happens to you two. 

  • Try to embrace what you like about your friend and why are you happy that these two people decided to get married. 

Don’t try to talk the way you’re not comfortable. Embrace who you are so that the speech would be unique and personal. Maintain a relaxed atmosphere, which will make your talk even more memorable.

How to Calm Yourself

You may be scared of giving a wedding speech in front of many guests, which is normal. Luckily, there are some tips on how to get over this type of anxiety. 

  • The speech doesn’t have to be extensive. Long speech can be boring and uninteresting, so a shorter talk is a much better option. 
  • Funny and entertaining speech can be performed in just a few minutes while still being sufficient.
  • Say what feels uppermost and make everything quick and easy. That will entertain the guests while you’ll be able to get off the podium as quick as you’ll please.

Cue Cards

Helpful is making notes of what you want to say on little cards. You’ll know what you wanted to say and you’ll feel more relaxed. Keep in mind that the card should only include some helpful phrases and an outline of your speech. Reading the whole sentence would be awkward. 

Being nervous in this situation is understandable, so don’t be afraid that somebody would make fun of you. Watch your body language, which can make you look even more nervous than you are. Remember that no guest is probably a professional speaker, meaning that some minor mistakes won’t matter. Focus on you – being relaxed and happy is what makes your speech great.

Practising in Front of Mirror

If you’re insecure about your abilities, try practising your speech in front of a mirror. Focus on what you’re saying and also on your body language. You can easily see your mistakes and correct them in the comfort of your home.

What If I Can´t Do It

What if you are asked to give a wedding speech but don’t want to do it? Don’t be afraid to say no! If you feel like it wouldn’t be a good speech and you’ll feel stress, feel free to refuse. 

If you have found some text, which tells you exactly what to say, it is better not to use it. Believe us, a few hours in front of the mirror does miracles. Emotions and relationships will help with writing your speech. On the other hand, these universal texts are usually monotonous and uninteresting.

Speech Given by the Marriage Officiant

Speech given by the marriage officiant is a necessary part of almost every wedding. If you are religious, then the talk is made by the priest and cannot be changed. On the other hand, non-religious couples can speak with the officiant and adjust the speech.  

  • Centre the speech on the newlyweds and the guests.
  • Every officiant has a unique speech, which they present. The bride and the groom usually leave the speech to the officiant. 
  • You can easily change the speech if you want to. 

If you decide to change the speech and have your own, it can be tricky to write it. The original text can be your guide, to which you add some moments from your life. Add some unformal vows so that the speech will be funny and entertaining. 

This speech is a big deal in your life, so it should stay formal and short while saying what is most important. That includes what good and bad things are related to marriage and wishes for a happy and long-lasting marriage. 

A wedding speech is an important topic since it is among the most popular wedding traditions. Make sure you get the perfect speaker, which is ideally your close friend. But, if you desire you hire a professional – do it. 

The speaker should focus on the preparation so that everything’s ideal. Believe us, giving a wedding speech isn’t as hard as it may seem.Â